All the Moments in Between

For all we know...we may never meet again.  Before you go, make this moment sweet again..." ~ Donny Hathaway

I listen to this song repeatedly.

It reminds me of how precious life is.

How precious love is.
How precious a person is.
How precious a relationship is.
How precious experience is.

How precious time is.

How precious THIS moment is.

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Birth.  Death.  Marriage.  Divorce.

These seem to be the occasions when we become most mindful of the "delicacy" of this experience we call life.  Either when it's exhilarated by newness, or shattered by loss.  One extreme, or the other.  What about all the moments in between?

It Didn't Matter

We argued earlier today.  And it was quite heated.  I got on his nerves...again.  And he's was getting on my nerves.  Again.

But now, it was the end of the day.  I had already taken my evening shower, and had now been in my late night designing mood, when suddenly he walked over to me, removed my laptop for a moment to pick me up, hold me and kiss me.  If his sole purpose was to stop me in my tracks JUST to give me some love, then that's more than okay with me.

Now, I smell his skin.  And it reminds me of the first time that I got that close to him and smelled his skin.  So it didn't matter that just a few hours ago...we were awkwardly silent.

Now, he was running his fingers through my hair again, just like he did our first few nights together.  And the high volume and stern tone of our angry voices from earlier...it didn't matter.

Now, I was looking at the hairs on his face.  The long ones.  The short ones.  The dark brown ones.  And the grey ones.  And my mind started to wander, and imagine his struggles, and his stresses.  And when I realized that as he was lying in my lap, with his eyes closed, relaxing to the tune of me rubbing his head, what had bothered him earlier today...it didn't matter.

Now, he's lying in my lap and his skin feels so soothingly good against mine.  I think about how cramped up we were, our first nights together.  Sitting in the back seat of my parked car...either in the park...or on some busy commercial street...or in front of his house.  It was a small space.  But for all I cared, it could have been a shoebox.  As long as he was there with me, touching me...it didn't matter.

A few minutes ago, I looked at the scar on his forehead.  And I remembered the story of how he got it.  He was imitating a character from one of my favorite movies.  I recall that we both laughed when he told me about it.

Now, I'm looking at the his eyebrows.  There's hair missing from his right side.  Is that from a minor injury?  Or not?  I think about the day when he'll tell me, and now I imagine that there will be something about that story that will remind us both of something else that we have in common.  Some additional piece to this unexplained bond that we share.  And at that moment, our nerves, those nerves from this morning, they won"t matter.

Damn.

What was the point of our grievances earlier today?

Now...I guess...

It didn't matter.

Sleep "good" Baby.

A Glimpse

While I lay there resting in his arms, with my eyes closed, his lips softly touched the side of my face. And for something less than a moment, my mind's eye saw two figures sharing that same moment, that same state of being, that same feeling. Was it us? I don't know. Was it heaven? I don't know. Was it recent, or long ago? I don't know. I don't know if I can describe who, what, when, where or even WHY it was. I only know, for certain, that it was. In some time, in some space. Beautiful. Whole. Pure. It was only a glimpse.

Peace. Harmony. Laughter. Love.

Yesterday, I walked in to work, only to be welcomed by the sound of someone “barking” at me for a mistake that I’d made.  Then, the office network went down, leaving me with no internet access, and no way to check or respond to emails.  There were a few things that needed to be done, like the weekly update (sent by email) to all of my internal customers, and the gathering of tools and information for the next monthly newsletter.  This short list of items, however, would have to wait.

After a “barely productive” day at work, I packed up my belongings, got in my car and headed for home.  Ahhh…the place where I can find a little sanctuary.  Then I received a text from my sister: “Where’s your daughter?”  The unmistakable tone of irritation was almost immediately followed by a phone call from my daughter.  “Can you please talk to Aunt NaNa?” – Apparently, while I was driving to my geographical destination of peace, there was a small dispute going on between my daughter and my sister, which quickly became a dispute between my sister and me.

Today…I woke up and took some time to meditate, and to thank God for life, love, peace, good health and prosperity.  Today…I woke up determined and purposeful in leaving the annoyances from yesterday in the past. 

What a difference! 

It’s amazing how your perspective can influence your entire day.

Does this mean that difficult people and annoying situations will not come up and challenge my patience?  No. That’s NOT at all what it means.

Instead, it means that I choose to take on the day, and the experiences that it may bring, with a clear understanding of what it is: an opportunity to create peace, harmony, laughter and love.  I know that this process starts with me.  When I begin my day by connecting with my source (My Creator), I establish an internal state of peace, and an atmosphere of harmony.  My connection with God reminds me that God is love.  I am created in the image and likeness of God.  I am love.  When I am in a state of peace and love, this, in turn, affects how I interact with others, and how I respond to stressful situations.

It is during this state of peace, love and harmony, that I can easily find something to laugh about.  A joke or funny story.  Maybe recalling something that brought a smile to my face, or to the face of someone that I love.  Believe it or not, now…I’m laughing.

Now, I remember that although I cannot control what people do or say, I can choose to respond in a way that does not adversely affect MY well-being.

I have the power to create an atmosphere of peace.  And so I choose to.

I have the power to create an atmosphere of harmony.  And so I choose to.

I have the power to create an atmosphere of laughter.  And so I choose to.

I have the power to create an atmosphere of love.  And so I choose to.

Love, Peace and Prosperity to you!
Katrena